Lulu's Letters: personal

Although I've never much found myself an interesting person, I realise getting to know one another is a great start to building friendships and to learning that even those behind the social media accounts are human, too! Without further ado, here are ten (perhaps commonly known?) facts about myself!

① I'm British-born, but have lived in the states for the majority of my life. While I still have my British citizenship, I lost the accent quite some time ago. It used to bother me immensely, but I've come to learn that something as silly as that doesn't define me.

② My favourite animals are dogs, bears, bunnies, small birds, and deer. Coincidentally, my favourite (noteable) animal characters include Pom Pom Purin, Isabelle, Rilakkuma, Pooh Bear, Duffy, and My Melody. With that being said, I do adore characters like Marie and Daisy, as well as others!

③ While I love everything and anything pink, my favourite colour actually happens to be sky blue! Pink tends to be easier to find, pairs better with certain colours, and look slightly better on me..!

④ Speaking of the sky, it's one of my favourite earthly gifts. To look up at the sky that wraps its arms around us so lovingly, knowing that it's ever-changing and still manages stay the same, connecting us all...it brings me such great peace.

⑤ When I was younger, I had dreams of joining Cirque du Soleil, of becoming a teacher, and of being a baker. Now, I'm still not quite sure want I want to be, other than kind.

⑥ I first became interested in fashion in 2009/2010, a time when I wore t-shirts, jeans, and had an arm full of 'kandi'. I owned a single copy of the Gothic Lolita Bible and would daydream about the girls/clothes I saw online. I found a blogger who was into Gyaru and quickly began researching everything I could. I went through Agejo, Amekaji, Hime, Onee and even a mori attempt before my heart fell for romantic brands like Ank Rouge, Liz Lisa, and even DreamV, with their subtle colours and cutesy patterns. It's taken quite some time to build up a wardrobe with clothes I feel both happy and comfortable in, but I'm so very proud of what I've managed so far!

⑦ I often dream about moving to a small cottage style town like Colmar in France and leading a quiet life with my Prince and our dogs. While I love the hustle and bustle of big cities, with the lights and glamour and fun, I'd much prefer a place that's as calm as I intend to be.

⑧ Prior to my boyfriend, I had never been kissed by the opposite sex. It may come as a surprise to some, but I am quite openly attracted to both sexes.

⑨ I've been into anime since I was very young, as both of my older sisters were into it, and I'm extremely pleased that it's a part of my life. I would watch anime after school in elementary, attended my first convention in 2005, bought my first cosplay in 2006 (though I took several years hiatus afterwards!), and have been collecting figures, manga, posters, and other such merchandise for many years! My favourite genres are, of course, shoujo, mahou shoujo, and idols!

⑩ I was not always as kind as I am now, nor am I always perfect. I slip up and I throw tantrums, say some not so kind words, yell and even curse. It's learning from the things I don't like about myself that makes me a better person. There is always room for progress.

I tried to be as diverse in my topics as possible, so I hope you found at least one interesting fact! Again, thank you to everyone who took the time to even read a smidgen of my novel, it's greatly appreciated.

With love, always,

Lucy

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Have you ever experienced those days where no matter what you do, without explanation, things just don't quite seem right? You're unsure why, nothing substantial has happened that could cause you to feel so blue, yet every little thing seems to add up and bother you? If you're like me in that you have a tendency to be an all around positive, happy-go-lucky person, these days may bother you, especially when they present themselves without reason! In an effort to turn those days around, I've thought of a small list of bothers that I've noticed contribute to (my) bad day, things you may not have considered before!

First, hygiene: when was the last time you bathed? Changed your clothes? Even washed your hands? Although I bathe nightly, I don't wash my hair every day (as it can strip the healthy oils!), and that can sometimes leave me feeling unclean. While a little talc in the hair stops the shine, it doesn't stop the icky sticky greasy feeling that shadows the rest of me! Your body may still feel heavy, as if it feels dirty, because truthfully it probably is! Dead skin cells start to accumulate, just as the dirt, oils, and sweat do as they settle into your scalp, leaving the rest of you feeling just as greasy as your hair does. No matter how cute you may look, it's difficult to feel it if instead, you feel weighed down with filth! Try showering in full, hair and all, with as mild a temperature water as you can stand. Too cold will leave you shivering while too hot can make you swelter and sweat (not to mention, cooler water helps tighten pores!).

Now that YOU'RE fresh, consider the other factors that go along with it, like the towels you're using and the clothes you're changing into. Are they also fresh, or have you been using the same towel so long you can't seem to remember when it was last changed. I tend to use my towels 2-3 days before 'throwing in the towel' and give them a little sniff before use each night. If the smell is similar to stagnant water or there's not much smell to it at all, it's time to take out a new one. It's no good to use a dirty towel, so drop that one in the laundry basket and wrap yourself in the heaven that is a fluffy, linen scented, clean towel! Clean body, check! Clean towel, check! Now what about your wardrobe? Whether you're about to get dressed up to go out or dressed down to stay in, if what you're wearing doesn't feel right, change it! While the pants you wore yesterday may not LOOK dirty, they may feel it, which is equally as poor a feeling as them being physically dirty. The same applies to the pajamas that, although they may be your most comfy favourite pajamas ever, still need to be washed every now and then. Even just changing your lounge wear if you don't have the time or energy to shower does wonders for the body and mind! In desperate situations, ones where I find I can't just hop up and shower or change my clothes to catch a break from that greasy, grimy feeling, I simply wash my hands. We often forget how much we've touched in a short amount of time and frankly, how dirty even our own things can be! I find that a good, quick scrub over gives me temporary relief from even my grossest feeling days.

While your body may be clean, your environment may be a different story. I've noticed that on days where I spend a bit of time in my room, especially on weekends, I can start to feel a bit agitated. I glance around my room at a small space that, granted, should be easy to keep clean, looking an utter wreck. Laundry piles, both clean and dirty, start to add up, makeup all over my desk...I haven't made my bed in, what, a week? Maybe more? I promised myself I'd tidy up on the weekend and now the weekend is here! ...yet I can't find the motivation to get it over with or to even get it started in the first place. In an odd way, it almost begins to feel as if everything around is slowly closing in or even suffocating, and that most certainly doesn't make me feel very positive. Other than how much more convenient it is to have things put in their place, tidy and fresh, don't you feel an overwhelming sense of satisfaction after you see how lovely your room looks? I feel that if you constantly live in dirty conditions, even just looking at it can make you shiver and feel dirty as a whole. Though it may not be easy or particularly fine, do your best to keep track of your room as you do yourself, staying on top of it to keep it clean. Turn on your happy music, open up the window (weather permitting, of course!), and pick a place to start that often gets the most abused! For me, my go to starting point is always my desk where I get ready in the mornings or my closet that's stuffed to the brim, waiting to overflow. Once you get the toughest parts over with, the rest should be a breeze! The more often you're able to clean, the less often you'll have to set aside time for a spring cleaning bonanza, too (well, unless you're into that sort of thing~)!

Next on the list of 'small reasons you might not feel yourself' is diet! This isn't to say that if you're eating comfort food to console yourself on a bad day, you're in the wrong. In fact, even if you've recently changed your diet to put yourself on track for a healthier lifestyle, you might still feel the same as someone who just ate cake for breakfast (guilty). It's not only what you eat, it's how much, and how your body responds to it! Food can often reflect your mood, meaning if you eat poor, you feel poor; but sometimes, we may not realise just how poorly we're eating. After coming home from work or running errands, waking up after a long nap or even when you just can't find the will, it's hard to cook a meal both your heart and tummy agree on. Still, eating not so friendly foods while you're down might worsen your mood! If you're already feeling sluggish and groggy, one might suggest to avoid greasy, heavy foods, sugary sweets, or overly processed food in general. Push for the lighter options, the ones that will make your belly and your mind sing to help you work through your funk! Although it may seem self explanatory, do your best to steer away from foods that your stomach doesn't agree with. Lactose, gluten, fried goods...they won't improve how you feel if they cause more harm than good, right?

And of course, perhaps most importantly...you might be feeling blue simply because. Not everything needs to have a deep, profound rhyme or reason. Your body, as beautiful and sensitive as it is, may just be having an off day or sequence of days. An imbalance of hormones, the start of a cold, work, school, stress or lack of sleep...you may not notice how these affect you until you find yourself struggling to keep yourself afloat with a smile on your face. Which leads me to this: you don't always have to be happy to be positive. Positivity is seeing the brighter side, trusting that despite how you feel now, things can and will get better. You shouldn't ever feel the need to force yourself, to fake your happiness for the sake of others. Being seen as the happy, upbeat one doesn't exclude you from or invalidate your other emotions; you're only human after all. Take pride in having others around you who notice that you may not be feeling 100%, and who understand that you, just like they, are taking time to figure yourself out. Just as some flowers take time to close their petals in their off seasons, you may feel the need to do the same during yours, and that's alright! What matters most is that you reopen them, renewed, ready to show the world your beauty once more. ♡

I hope you were able to find some solace in these words of mine and if you have any suggestions of your own, I'd love if you'd share them! Take care and until next time,

With love, always,

Lucy

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